Back -- and pissed

Yeah, I've bene gone for awhile but let's cut to the chase. I'm pissed and I have a blog-- so dangit, I'm speaking out.

My old college newspaper just ran a piece of rape apologist drivel.

It has really pissed me off. So I wrote this back.

What was the point of Mr. Brorby article, “One-night standing: the Method”? Was this supposed to be edgy? A form of satire? Entertaining? I’d have to say that whatever this article way trying to be—it failed.

Call me humorless, but I don’t think it’s funny to joke about getting a woman (or anyone for that matter) into a vulnerable position in the hopes of commiting sexually assault. What I find most upsetting, besides the fact that this article was ever published. is that the online comments at the D.S. website rely heavily on blaming the victim.

I don't think it was Mr. Brorby’s intention, but his article got one thing right -- he highlighted the predatory mentality of a rapist. Too many people say that intoxicated victims deserve what they get. Well let’s be clear, it doesn’t matter how much you drink, what you wear, what you say or how you act. The only mitigating factor in an assault is proximity to a rapist. It’s cruel to suggest otherwise. Otherwise we are saying that most men would rape if presented with an opportunity.

My first job after graduating UND was with Fargo’s Rape & Abuse Crisis Center. Sometimes I would be called to the hospital to sit with victims during the rape kit exam. I held the victim's hand and sometimes I would meet with the family and friends in the waiting room. I didn’t find too much to laugh about on those days.

In many of those cases, alcohol was used to facilitate the rape. Too many times I found myself reassuring the victim or her family that this did not make it the victim’s fault. The only person to blame for the rape was the rapist. The attacker found the opportunity they were looking for—that is all.

If we really want to be edgy when we talk about rape, how about we call out the victim blaming attitudes that run rampant in our communities, schools and culture? Maybe we quit suggesting that people who look for casual sex are somehow asking for rape? Maybe we run an article from Mr. Brorby where he apologizes for being thoughtless and rubbing salt in the wounds of people like me—or worse, victims of sexual assault.

I would really like to read that article.


PS: I think it would be pertinent for Josh Brorby and any editor who allowed this to run to tender resignations immediately. This article is a blot on our school’s reputation

So even if you aren't a recent graduate like myself, please give them hell for me
dstudenteditor@und.edu,
michael.thomas@und.edu

Dane Cook -- turning a corner?

(my apologies for the rough video)

Here is a transcript:

… We’re not supposed to say the word "gay" anymore. It’s hurtful. But the commercial really bugs me. Because if you’ve seen it --- It’s two girls shopping in a department store and one of them puts on a shirt and she’s like, “Hey do you like my shirt” and the friend’s like, “It looks kind of gay on you” – and then Hillary duff comes out of nowhere and is like, ‘You shouldn’t say that!”

Oh thank you Hillary duff!

Sometimes when I find myself in a life conundrum, I think, what the fuck would Hillary Duff tell me to do with my business ---- or even Haley duff?”

I think the word we need to remove from our everyday vernacular is the word “raped.”

I think the word raped gets thrown around far too casually. You ever listen to a bunch of guys playing video games with each other online? It’s like, “Ah man you shot me in the back dude. You raped me dude!”

I’m pretty sure if I talked to a woman who’s been through that horrific situation and I said, “What was it like you know being raped?" She’s not gonna look at me and go ,”Have you ever played Halo?”

I have to say I was a little blown away by this bit. Dane Cook is not a favorite in the feminist community and for good reason-- his track record is not exactly progressive, woman-friendly or (some may say) even funny.

But this piece of his show made my jaw drop. This is an argument feminists have made for some time and here he is dropping this into a comedy routine that he knows is watched (primarily) by young, adult male fans.

I kept watching the special and actually found myself enjoying parts of it-- I was especially surprised how he could be moving and funny when talking about losing both his parents to cancer.

I read this review of the show which summed it up nicely

On IsOlated INcident, Cook covers the election of a black president and what that means for race remarks, the passing of his parents, hate mail, the overuse of the word "rape," role-playing with his girlfriend and some standard observational stuff about ordering a sandwich in a restaurant. Some of it is new territory for Cook; he's never really done political humor before, and it shows. The jokes he makes about politics and race seem written less because he has something to say on the those topics than because it's the kind of stuff that other, edgier comics do. It feels a little like he's checking items off a list.

Cook fares a little better when getting personal, talking about his parents death from cancer. It's more open and honest than the comic has ever been, and it segues into a story about an angry email he got from a non-fan. That's the first time I've heard Cook acknowledge and confront the fact that there are a lot of people who don't like him. Of course, the punchline to the bit is that Cook is victorious and still more awesome than everyone -- a recurring theme in his act. I don't think I've ever heard him be self-deprecating. I guess it's not on his checklist.

Still, ISolated INcident is the best thing Cook has done in his incredibly successful career. He seems to have worked up actual material and jokes, rather than just relying on inventing catchphrases or being overly articulate and letting the roars of all-approving laughter cover up everything that's missing. If this were Cook's first special and not some back-to-basics stunt, I would say that Cook shows promise and is a comic to watch. Instead, I get the feeling it's a an exercise; a test Cook is giving himself to prove that he can do it.

To some extent, Cook is a victim of his own press. The promotional material for ISolated INcident tries to sell us on the idea that Cook has always been a risk-taker (he hasn't) and that he's totally reinventing himself on his newest album (he isn't). If INcidentwere an indication of where Cook's career is headed, I would find that promising; though far from perfect, there are some genuinely funny moments to be found. Sadly, I suspect it's just a one-off -- a press-grabbing detour before going back to his stadiums full of screaming fans.

So what do we think-- whether or not you enjoy his style of comedy, does Cook hit a positive feminist note for calling out casual use of the word "rape" or is he the same old jerk?

I have high hopes for him because lord knows he holds sway over many adolscent male minds (and I'm not just talking REAL adolescents... I mean the 20-something men who still act adolescent too!)

Dane Cook is far from perfect but I have to admit, some of his jokes have made me laugh before. If he could make his act both funny and smart... that would be something to see...

Media may induce dizziness and nausea

Between going back to college, planning a wedding, looking for homes and struggling with a super busy job (all wonderful things I give you that) I've had little time to blog. But there's more pressing reasons... like for instance, with all the crap out there-- where do you start?


Sounds like Jon from Jon and Kate + 8 is cheating on his wife.
But it's okay because girls are lining up to screw him. You see, Kate is really a castrating bitch and her haircut sucks.

Then there was this gem Tyler found in the men's restroom when we were out to dinner.



In case you can't read the text on this ad, it says:
"Everybody & Everything gets older... isn't restored more exciting?"
The photo shows a rusted out, door-less bug next to an older women with gray hair and a hot car is placed next to a young, tan woman in a skimpy bikini.

**You can contact this company and let them know what you think of their advertising-- nzcustoms@integra.net

Then there's this ad that I keep seeing -- a whole new twist on the "headless fatty" thing the press loves to do. Not only are they not human, they are over-inflated beach balls. Just what I need is some self-righteous "fat is soooooo bad for you" person searching my double chin for some release valve.



Oh and don't get me started on Perez Hilton and Miss California. Could they both win America's #1 asshole and Runner-up? Seriously...

But John McCain is still a pile of stinky garbage

In regards to yesterday's post where I said Meghan McCain is pretty sweet....

Her dad is still a jackass.

And suddenly I like Meghan McCain

And more than ever, loathe Laura Ingraham.

Meghan McCain may not share my political point of view but I respect the hard work she did for her father's campaign (and she blogged while doing it!) And I respect any young woman who boldly steps into the world of politics today because, well... this happens...

Some back story: Meghan McCain has been writing on a blog called "The Daily Beast" and recently suggested that republicans and Dems should play nice. Conservative talk show host, Laura Ingraham took issue with this and spoke about Meghan on her show, not about her opinions (silly!), but about her body (of course).

She called McCain "a valley girl gone awry" and a "plus-sized model." Read the full transcript of Ingraham's assholery here.

***ASIDE-- Using "plus sized model" as an insult is just a total cluster of stupid-- #1 A plus size model is probably between a size 8 and 10 -- #2 Meghan McCain is beautiful and #3 Who the F**K cares even if Meghan McCain had to be wheeled around like jabba the freaking hutt?? Also, I seem to recall Laura Ingraham being one of the republican commentators that was SO UPSET about the unfair, sexist treatment Sarah Palin received. I guess republican women are only defended from sexism if they're towing the party line. Shocker!

BACK ON TASK-- The feminist community and women's online community are well aware that speaking your mind while female more often brings up comments about appearance or worse (threats of violence) than actual political discourse.

Ingraham's comment is just one more in a sea of public commentary -- political or otherwise-- that silences, mocks and demeans women for appearance. I can think of no similar situation with a male blogger or politico of any age being treated to this type of scrutiny on weight or appearance. But for women -- it's so common -- so INSANELY common that I doubt we'll hear much more on this story. Ingraham's schoolyard harassment tactics will be labeled 'no big deal,' and we'll be expected to move on.

Thank God McCain isn't taking it lying down.



Big shocker: When commenting on McCain's response, Ingraham said, “Can I say ‘lighten up,’ or is that offensive too?” She also pulled out time-honored asshole statement -- telling McCain that she needs to learn to deal with satire and “teasing.”

Word to Ingraham-- satire should be funny. Teasing should be good natured... and oh yeah, you suck! But that has nothing to do with your looks.... just your "personality."

Woman bruttaly attacked -- media sells it for entertainment

*Trigger warning

It was Melissa McEwan of Shakesville who first pointed out the HIGHLY disturbing trend of reporting stories of violence against women in “odd news” section fronts. As if the murder and terrorizing of women is something novel or interesting and not a sad commentary on a violent, patriarchal society.

Today a lump caught in my throat at seeing this.


The attacker, 28-year-old Thomas Lee Rowley was described in the article as a “spurned lover” as if this was merely a spat between boyfriend and girlfriend and not a vicious attack. In fact, I’d go so far as to classify this as a sexual assault.

This man was convinced he had ownership of this woman’s breasts (which he undoubtedly associated with sex). I don’t care if he paid for 100 breast agumentations for this woman. He never OWNED part of her body.

Thankfully she survived 6 stab wounds and the punctured implants were repaired. Sadly, the story was filed here.



Thanks MSNBC

PS: Rowley is on trial in Superior Court in Victorville for attempted murder, assault with a deadly weapon, stalking, burglary, and false imprisonment.

HOW WEIRD!

I suck lately

I have not been blogging here and it's totally lame.

But I did blog here.

It's about men who work as clinic escorts.

So there's that

*I know, it's still uncool*